


steady as the morning

by doubtthestars



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Footy Ficathon, M/M, a loan is not forever, have some angst, i think i sold my soul to the football fandom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-03
Updated: 2015-01-03
Packaged: 2018-03-05 05:16:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3107537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doubtthestars/pseuds/doubtthestars
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lukas calls Basti when the loan goes through. He listens and finds the answer he was looking for.</p>
            </blockquote>





	steady as the morning

**Author's Note:**

> But if this goes wrong again, oh heaven forbid.  
> If this was how it was meant to fall.  
> If this goes wrong again,  
> well you pretend that you know.  
> (and just go)  
> \--Soldiers, Ben Howard

He calls Bastian before Monika and that somehow defines everything that ever was between them, the three of them. 

(Lukas had to make up for some sort of sin--Cologne in 2009 comes to mind, but what he truly means is 2011)

"Luki?" the exhaustion in his voice burns in the back of Lukas' throat because what right does he have, what right when--

"Basti, the loan agreement went through with Inter." Barely a murmur, it wasn't a welcome statement he was sure, because Bastian knew how much he had sacrificed for Arsenal and now he had to start all over again. He was putting more miles between his family and himself and Germany already seemed too far away.

"Oh," he sounds wide awake with just a syllable. Lukas could almost picture him, maybe in bed sitting up on the mountain of pillows supporting him and his old bones. He smiles before catching himself.

(There isn't an angry bone in his body, but disappointment rings in the hollows. He was leaving another country he had made a home in because of the whims of the world.)

"At least...you might see Miro and the kids. Louis would like that. You could organize your own German team right in Italy." Bastian joked. 

(Something broke at the thought of having to play against Miro, his idol, his friend, the only one that had understood _Aussiedler_ and had given him the chance to exercise his clumsy tongue trying to find a bit of homeland.)

His composure left him and he choked on the knot in his throat.

"I'm scared. What if they, what if this happens again?" _I am getting too old to give my heart away._

Lukas can't remember his two year old self, but he knows what Louis looked like and he wonders if it's some sort of omen, some genetic disposition to scatter with the wind and land on your feet on new soil waiting to root.

"You'll always have a place here. You can always return, but first enjoy the Italian sun and food. They'll love you, I know it, no one can resist Lukas Podolski, especially when he plays with all of his heart." Bastian's voice is light yet fierce all at once. 

(It reminds him of the start. The golden duo with Germany's hopes on their shoulders. Ten years had passed and he was still trying to find a home when all along it was in Bastian but that would have to wait until later, until they were--)

"I miss you." instead of goodbye, instead of _I love you_. 

"Bring me back a scarf yeah?" Lukas smiled, wondering if black and blue would clash with Bastian's eyes.

"Of course."

**Author's Note:**

> Aussiedler-"right of return" allows persons of German descent living in countries of the former Warsaw pact the right to return to Germany and claim German citizenship.
> 
> I'm sorry it's so angsty. I have discovered my feels about foreigners trying to make it on different soil not only applies to the ones that run away willingly(xabi fucking alonso) but the ones who have to go.
> 
> i'm taking prompt requests over on tumblr @ miroklosely but i also avidly stalk the footy fication.


End file.
